Notes on dirty talk
By Serge Kreutz
While many of my articles evaluate how the sexual response can by influenced pharmacologically, a more traditional way is through sexual language or depictions of sexual acts.
Words or pictures, or thoughts (which are mostly formulated as words or imagined as pictures), can be powerful in initializing a string of sexual reactions. They can cause a mental fixation on sexual acts strong enough to make us forget that it’s not worth to be alive.
This doesn’t contradict the assumption that all bodily functions, including those of the brain, are first of all biochemical processes. It’s just an example that biochemical processes of the brain can be triggered by other methods than chemical agents: the senses, memory, and even abstract reasoning.
It is possible to modulate the susceptibility for words and pictures with medications that suppress the hormone prolactin. High prolactin levels are associated with motherly attitudes and a lack of sexual appetite.
Healthy people other than breast-feeding mothers usually don’t have to worry about their prolactin levels. Nevertheless, dopaminergics are bought by an increasing number of people not for the treatment of Parkinson’s but for its prolactin-suppressing and sexuality-enhancing properties.
While dopaminergics will, to a certain extent, work in focusing the mind on sexual thoughts and acts, it would be amateurish to disregard the power of words as an agent for sexual enhancement (and I am not saying this because as a writer, I’d like to stick to the tools of my trade).
Maybe women more than men are open to the power of words when it comes to sexual enhancement. Tell your current girlfriend some details of your sex life with the previous one, and chances are this will work better than mixing something into her orange juice.
Lacing someone’s drink is a criminal act, and can have expensive consequences.
Talk is cheap. No jury will convict you of date rape because you got her into the mood by talking about how it was with the previous one.
If you’re with your wife, and if the relationship lacks zest, try something more explicit. Talk about what you dreamed last night (you can make that up in any way you think may work). And if you’re not good in making up stories, get help from such works of “science” that have been written about the sexual fantasies of women. Or, for some heavier artillery, read de Sade’s Justine.
Most women, even those who are good mothers and housewives, are amazingly susceptible to fantasies such as being the only female among ten or twenty men on a Robinson island.
Women read more fiction than men do, and spinning stories into which women can channel their sexual fantasies makes for a whole genre of literature.
To indulge in some fantasies doesn’t mean that there is a serious desire to turn them into reality. Most women who can be aroused by stories about them being served by a group of men would balk at a proposal to have such a setting actually implemented. They WILL refuse even if they may have whispered “I want” when such a setting was verbally fantasized about while enjoying sexual intercourse (with just one man, that is). It’s not only that women may be better capable to differentiate between fantasies and reality.
It’s also understandable that in an undisturbed situation (when being together with just one man), a woman may, in her fantasies, be open for the thrill of the idea of being served by several men, while avoiding the complications that such an endeavor would result in when tried in real life.